Elephants

When we announced my pregnancy on facebook I shared a little bit of my story in the pictures I shared with that post. After my miscarriage Olivia sent me a care package. One of the items in the box was a black cord bracelet with an elephant charm on it. It was called a ‘mummy bracelet’ (It came from England). The package it came in had the below written on the piece of cardstock the bracelet was attached to:

Many African cultures revere the elephant as a symbol of strength and power. Elephants are extremely protective of their young and other members of the herd. Elephants will die to protect their families.

Never Forget

You are strong

You are brave

You are loved

You are a mummy

In her note to me Olivia said that I was strong and fierce, just like a momma elephant and one day I would have my own herd; until then I was still a mom, even though I didn’t get to meet my baby. I hadn’t considered the fact that I could identify as a mother because I thought motherhood started at birth, but it really starts at conception. I held on to that thought that I was a mother and in God’s timing I would have children to match the title.

A few months later I attended a bridal shower for Hannah PB in Columbus. A large part of the shower was just hanging out and making bracelets. I hadn’t met any of her friends prior to this day so I sat and chatted with several of them while making these bracelets. (Really cool shower idea btw – highly recommend it) The host, Anne, had metal discs and stamps we could use to decorate our finished products – you literally pound the stamps into the discs – very therapeutic. When I started making the bracelets I hadn’t looked through the stamp collection; I was just arranging beads in what felt like a logical order and putting them on the elastic string. Then I went back to the stamp room and saw an elephant stamp and elephant charms/beads and I could have cried. Anne’s daughters showed me what to do to stamp and round the disc for my one bracelet and add the charm/bead to my other bracelet.

I wear my bracelet from Liv every day. It’s tied on pretty tight so it’s not coming off until it falls off from wear in the coming years. Any time I was feeling extra down I’d wear the other two bracelets too. I didn’t realize until right now as I’m writing this that I never once wore just one. Something about just one never looked right so if I wore one I wore the other so I had three elephants on my wrist. Funny how God works, isn’t it? He knew I’d have two baby elephants of my own long before I did.

A couple weeks ago my co-workers gave me a ‘bump box’. It was 100% unexpected and so appreciated. I was holding it together as I unwrapped all the various items that were chosen so intentionally by each of them just for me. And then I got to this little purple velvet bag. Inside was a necklace – a momma elephant leading two baby elephants - and my eyes filled with tears. I will love and protect and guard these babies with the fierceness of a momma elephant, and I am never taking this necklace off.